When does someone turn into an adult? One thing’s for sure, age is not a reliable indicator. But courage and responsibility are two of the most obvious sign of maturity.
Yesterday I talked with an old friend which I knew since 12 years ago. A talented drummer who’s been playing for several well-known independent bands in Surabaya. He is now married, expecting a baby (his wife is 7 month-old pregnant), worked in a factory during daytime, and still play with his band at night. Things went well, until recently he felt uninspired and exhausted. He said, “Working in the factory gave me a regular paycheck, and it’s good for my family because they need financial stability, but I’m planning to quit because it’s going against my idealism.”
Turns out this so-called ‘idealism’ he have in his mind is that “people must not work for money, but for passion..” and that “if we don’t like our job, we can always quit, money is not a big deal..” has took over his sanity and made him forgot the existence of his pregnant wife. But I don’t blame him. He might be 35 year-old, but his mind is still like a 17 year-old.
It always frustrates me when people are talking about idealism, passion, and rejecting the idea that some of us have to take a job that we dislike. Well, in my dictionary, all of these sacrifices does not mean I’m compromising my idealism whatsoever, it is called “responsibility.” And if following your passion means making your family suffer, starving and sick, I’d rather not have a passion at all. People have dreams, some are lucky enough to have an occupation that matched with their passion, while some are not. Idealism is a way of life, it’s how we see things in life and how we think about certain events. It is certainly NOT an occupation, and judging someone from their occupation solely is not wise.
In the end, it’s not your idealism that will determine your maturity and how much respect people will give you, it’s how much courage you have to show your responsibility, even if it means you have to do something that you don’t like.
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